Finding Balance as a Caregiver: Filling Up Your ‘Tow Truck’ with Self-Care

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

Hey Sweet Friends and Families,

As moms, dads, grandparents and caregivers we all have those times when we feel like a tow truck without gas. As caregivers we are constantly “in tow.” We feel like we are expected to keep moving, keep making meals, keep doing homework/projects with our kids, keep washing dishes, keep the house clean, then go to bed and wake up to do it all over again. The problem is, sometimes… a lot of times 🙂 we don’t have any energy (gas) to do it. We are finding ourselves in situations where we don’t have our needs met in order to help the needs of others.

As caregivers to our sweet kiddos we want to keep giving, loving and taking care of them because that is what we were designed to do as we became parents. We often feel selfish if we want time for ourselves and often find ourselves sacrificing for the sake of our little ones. As wonderful and selfless as that may sound, if we don’t have gas in our tow truck, are we really doing the right thing?

When we take care of ourselves we model to our children to take care of themselves.

So, how do we have a balance? How do we still take care of our kiddos while taking care of ourselves, so that neither lose?

Setting Room Time for Self Care

One way that I implemented taking care of myself was setting a consistent room time. I started it when the kids were babies during their nap time. I would take that time to myself to either go on a walk, take a nap, watch a show, play a game or go get my toes done. My husband and I worked out staying home with the baby during that time and continued to make this an important part of our day. As the kids got to the age of 4, we didn’t call it nap time anymore, but room time. In that room time they could choose to rest, look at books or play quietly, but they were not allowed out of their rooms. The time ranged between one and a half to two hours. Most of the time, they did end up taking a nap, because we would go run and play outside leading up to that time. To this day, we still do have room time some days, and because it has been implemented for so many years, there isn’t really a push back.

The best steps your kids will ever take are the steps toward taking care of their mind, body and soul.

Nature as a source of Healing

Another outlet has become Nature….. being outside……. laying on a blanket in the grass. I never realized the true healing of being in nature until this year. Our family recently stumbled across the website 1000 hours outside. To say its been life changing is an understatement. Being outside has given me a sense of freedom, a non clutter in my head, an appreciation of the area I live in and the beauty of simplicity. Being outside more means less cleaning, less stress, less distractions and more time with family. It is a natural medicine on a bad day and I can always count on it. I love how it has started transforming our day, the village we have built because of it and the positive impact it has had on our family to try and be outside each day. See my other post on this.

The Why Behind it

I remember my dad sharing with me his love for his mom. She died before I was born, so I never had the opportunity to witness the kind things he shared about her. He also shared that she died of breast cancer. He said that she knew when the stage was early, but spent so much time wanting to care for their family, that she didn’t go get it taken care of in time. My heart is crushed every time I remember his story of his mom.

Making appointments for yourself is usually the last thought on your mind. As we are making appointments for the rest of the family, it is easy for a year to go by, before realizing that you haven’t had a check up yourself. One thing that I have started doing is scheduling my next doctor appointment before leaving the office even if I’m not sure that I will be able to take off. It is a way of holding me accountable for checking my calendar and the email reminders remind me to find a way to make it happen. Just don’t forget to cancel and reschedule if there is absolutely no way you can make it.

You are important. When you value yourself, others will value you as well as themselves.

Taking care of ourselves is the only way that our kiddos will get to have us around for years to come. One last thing I want to share with you is a planner that I use. It is called the Legend Planner- Deluxe. Its more than a calendar, as it has you think about the dreams you have for yourself, important life questions, your vision for your life, mind map, etc. I absolutely love it. I love that it is a journal, accountability partner, calendar and life map all in one. The calendar part is blank so that you can start in the month that you get it and it can even be referred to after the year is up. I still look at my one from last year to track my growth and see how my dreams have changed, been met or have stayed the same.

“A Healthy Outside Starts from the Inside.”- Robert Urich

The Takeaways:

Remember that you are important, you have value and to continue taking care of yourself! Time in nature, room time for your kids while you take a break, setting doctor appointments for yourself and using a calendar are all ways that you can continue to make sure your health is improving too.

Sincerely,

Learning Alongside You

As you go about your day, your week, your month, your year, remember that you were created on purpose for a purpose and so was your child.

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